And God logged on at 00:00:01, day 1.
# LET THERE BE LIGHT!
Unrecognisable command. Try again.
# CREATE LIGHT
Done
# RUN HEAVEN AND EARTH
And God created Day and Night. And God saw that there were 0 errors.

You have to see this, click here.

My neighbours are stealing my wireless internet access. I could encrypt it or alternately I could have fun. (more…)

The laws of butterology demand that the butter must hit the ground, and the equally strict laws of feline aerodynamics demand that the cat can not smash its furry back. If the combined construct were to land, nature would have no way to resolve this paradox. Therefore it simply does not fall.

This is the secret of antigravity! A buttered cat will, when released, quickly move to a height where the forces of cat-twisting and butter repulsion are in equilibrium. This equilibrium point can be modified by scraping off some of the butter, providing lift, or removing some of the cat’s limbs, allowing descent.

The other thing to keep in mind is that you’d have to be careful where the cat is dropped…in the northern hemisphere, the spinning cat would, of course, spin in a counterclockwise direction, ala hurricanes and toilet bowls. South of the equator, the reverse would be true. A regulatory commission would have to be established to prevent mean spirited people from dropping buttered cats ON the equator, which would cause them to spin both ways at once, either turning them inside out or making them politicians.

This might be a deliberate parody, or it might be the real thing. Either way, put down that coffee before you watch it or things will get messy. The video shows a Vista user trying to program a PERL script using Window’s new voice recognition technology. Hilarious. Video after the jump…

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We’re not all a bunch of champagne-sipping, migrant-worker-hiring John D. Rockefellers. Those of us who may not necessarily be able to pay for things like schooling or clean pants receive our education from the School of Hard Dieing. We may not be able to cure cancer, or repair a spaceship or even read, but Professor John “Fuck You” McClane, in just four movies, has taught us all we need to know to succeed in life.
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